As a girl, I wanted to grow up, have a career and when it's the time to grow up, I gave 101 reasons not to turn into an adult. I wanted to apply to some school to obtain a degree but I knew I have to work to support the expenses. Darn.! I just couldn't stop having mind blowing dates, casual outings and do nothing except make myself fat. Trust me, I just looked at myself in the mirror and I had the shock of my life. That's it. I'm bringing sandwich to work tomorrow.! Speaking of work, I need to start being a good daughter and pay the bills. I even need to buy my own baju raya this year. Tsk.!

R asked me if I ever wanted to find another boyfriend and hell yeah I wanted to shout "YES" in his face. Instead, I just looked ahead of me and had buzzing thoughts in my head. Maybe I did drift a couple of times but like everyone wondered, why the hell I did I stick around for some time now.? Partly because I chose to, and another was the fact that he stayed with me when I had my darn breakout and ugly pimples on my face. Let's see, he did not jilt me despite me growing one jean size bigger and he put up with me having quite a social life these few days. Oh, my schedule was super tight back when I was in school, and I would be busy with mega perdana and work, but I knew he would still stick around. Why.? Because he's like me. We don't need to see each other every single day. A call would be enough.

How confident can I be with him.? I must admit that I do feel like giving up sometimes, give him a kick in the groin and just place the whole PIG at his front door. Ever heard of going with the flow.? That's not it, really. I just discovered that his mindset was quite similar as mine. Thank God.! It's just a mutual feeling that we trust that no matter what, the boyfriend/girlfriend would always win. Matair vs scandal.? 1-0. But that doesn't mean that we should just find a scandal. It just meant that if you're not stable, don't you dare talk about being serious. Love is love but reality check. Love won't pay the taxes. I have my whole life ahead of me, no.?

I appeared to be strong but if shit were to happen, I would still cry and wallow with ben&jerry's cookie dough. Then again, I would pick up the pieces and tell myself that I'm intelligent, and I deserve better. Seriously R, I don't need a replacement now.

Oh, I stayed over at Furama City Centre for a splendid birthday surprise for Kak Aishah before heading for perdana on Sunday. I tell you, the suite was gerek nak mampos.! More details up soon. For now, I have R to layan before I go to bed.

I thought my life was becoming mundane with only boyfriend and friends. Hell, no.! If my life start to lose its colour, I'll tell you, and then you would see me going to the pet store buy cat food every week. Oke bye.!